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“Man’s inhumanity to man”--the phrase is all too
familiar. But until Phyllis Chesler's now-classic book, a
profound silence prevailed about woman’s inhumanity to
woman. Women's aggression may not take the same form as
men's, but girls and women are indeed aggressive, often
indirectly and mainly toward one another. They judge harshly,
hold grudges, gossip, exclude, and disconnect from other
women.
Like men, women are exposed to the
messages of misogyny and sexism that permeate cultures
worldwide. Like men, women unconsciously buy into negative
images that can trigger abuse and mistreatment of other
women. But like other social victims, many do not realize
stereotyping affects members within the victimized group as
well as those outside the group. They do not realize their
behavior reflects society's biases.
How women view and treat other women
matters. Are women oppressed? Yes. Do oppressed people
internalize their oppressors' attitudes? Without a doubt.
Prejudice must first be acknowledged before it can be
resisted or overcome. More than men, women depend upon one
another for emotional intimacy and bonding, and exclusionary
and sexist behavior enforces female conformity and
discourages independence and psychological growth.
Continuing the pioneering work begun
in Women and Madness—Chesler's bestselling book that
broke the story on double standards in
psychology—Woman's Inhumanity to Woman draws on
important studies, revolutionary theories, literature, and
hundreds of original interviews. Chesler urges us to look
within, to treat other women realistically, ethically, and
kindly, and to forge bold and compassionate alliances. This
is a necessary next step for women, without which they will
never be liberated.
BoilerplateReviewed by Cantalopian, 2010-03-09
The book was good. Ish. There were long stretches of blather,
incidents and so on. She did this, she said that, etc. But the good
part was exposing the cruelty and pettiness of one woman to
another, especially in intimate and power relationships. Many of us
have been aware of this cruelty, but discussion of it has been
suppressed by current social mores.
The title is comfort enoughReviewed by Jeannine Vegh, 2010-02-28
I've just purchased this book after it was recommended to me on a
Linked in group that I belong to. I wrote to Phyllis Chessler via
her website and she responded within the hour, I think she is my
new heroine. She probably is anyway just based on the fact that she
wrote the book. The title alone is one that I can sit with for
hours in despair thinking of so many stories of what I have endured
in my 47 years.
With work, while at university, in relationships to women I have
experienced horrible atrocities in my life that would never have
happened with men. Men, you can talk to and they cut it out. With
women, it is on-going gossip, frustration, jealousy, and
back-stabbing. I look forward to reading this book though the title
is such a comfort to me. The fact that I am not crazy and that
women really do look at me differently - in my case because I am
single and attractive, the title alone is enough to calm my spirit
until I finish reading the entire study. Once I finish reading I
will come back and edit this. For now, she is my new heroine!
Lyme (Disease) Produces a LemonReviewed by The Postman, 2009-09-03
An astonishing work, mainly in light of the fact that it took an
alleged 20 years to write it. More likely it took twenty years to
read all the books she has cut and pasted into this so-called work.
Indented block quotes take up half the 500 pages of the curiously
double-spaced print. One gets the feeling she wanted to make the
book as long as possible in the mistaken impression that quantity
implies quality. Even the briefest review of this work reveals that
this is certainly not the case.
This is a lazy work; there is virtually nothing here in the way of
analysis; this book is little more than a survey of other people's
research and personal tales of woe, presented in the dullest of
pedantic tones, often stating the patently obvious as if it were
some sort of revelation. Ostensibly a quasi-treatise on female
interpersonal relations, this book is actually an extended bit of
"soap Oprah" in which Chesler, in between the extensive quotes,
grinds many an axe against all the women she deems to have offended
(i.e., disagreed with) or mistreated her, especially her mother.
The book could easily have been titled, "My Mother's Inhumanity to
Me." Chesler, is of course, always more sinned against than
sinning. No doubt being a self-proclaimed feminist icon tends to
make you think that way.
Save your money, dear reader. If you want genuine entertaining and
insightful observations about the Evil That Women Visit Upon Each
Other, read instead Natalie Angier's chapter on the subject in her
book, "Woman," or Louann Brizendine's book, "The Female Brain."
These two works are superior to Chesler's book in every way.
The Author, The Subject and The Book Rocked My WorldReviewed by Joy Rose, 2009-06-12
I heard Dr. Phyllis Chesler present this material at the 'Association For Research On Mothering and Mamapalooza' Conference in NYC. She spoke to a packed room of feminists of every age, from 19 -80 years old. Each of us were forced to confront this subject with honest, open eyes and this book is a MUST READ for women looking to turn the tables on what has gone before and what must come next. It's a smart read and I hope women everywhere will pick it up and learn these lessons so we can move forward - Finally - Please! Bravo once again Phyllis.
For every feminist's bookshelf: Speaking (difficult) truthsReviewed by JR, 2009-06-09
As the saying goes, no prophet can preach in his or her own town.
Phyllis Chesler has drawn fire from many leading feminists for her
forthright criticism of the women's movement in The Death of
Feminism and other writings. In this book, Chesler speaks out
against a force which undermines women in the drive toward full
equality and names it Woman's Inhumanity to Woman. She bases her
censure on a weighty overview of scholarly literature and relevant
interdisciplinary sources - psychology, history, literature - which
is striking in its comprehensive scope. Yet her incisive writing
and use of personal anecdotes makes this book gripping and readable
throughout. The revised edition provides valuable new perspective
on the themes covered in the original, making it a welcome
addition.
True to her reputation as provocative, Chesler minces no words and
spares no sacred cows. Yet her critique, while often scathing,
stems from a place of optimism and from her ultimate confidence in
the women's movement to overcome defensiveness and address this
important issue, as well as in women and their ability to bridge
chasms of mistrust. Her outspokenness challenges us to honest and
open discussion. Only once women cease undermining one another and
themselves can there be hope: true liberation is not granted by the
Male oppressor but comes from within.